Plastic Jesus

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The United States Marine Corpss has decided to accept Talking Jesus dolls into their Toys for Tots program. Sure hope none of those dolls are gay, though the one in the middle looks pretty buff to me. Lord knows, the NC Baptist Convention would find itself in a swivet if that happened.

Guess what the old guy with the gray beard says when you push his button?

"You shall not make for yourself a graven image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above . . . " (Exodus 20:4-6 RSV)

I guess you make money selling Jesus action figures, there's no sense letting a little thing like the Second Commandment get in the way of bidness.

Comments

Back in Vacation Bible School

I used the be the king of Bible Sword Drills . . . fast-draw verse finding. I once won my own zippered Bible for finding "Jesus wept" before any of the other kids.

Jesus wept. No kidding.

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We are not amused.

Are you sure it wasn't

Jesus Swept... :)

Robin Hayes lied. Nobody died, but thousands of folks lost their jobs.



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Vote Democratic, the ass you save may be your own.

From my soon to be famous novel . . .

Gary was five when his mother got swept up in the gentle art of broom craft during a visit to the South Carolina state fair. Over the next decade, her own strange talent emerged as she married gnarled wisteria branches to handsome cornstraw heads. Twisted Kays, she called them. Collectible country chic.

Business was good for a few years, but then Kay decided to get god involved and things went to hell fast. She’d been watching a TV preacher as he read from the Gospel of John, chapter eleven, verse thirty-five. The preacher said ‘Jesus wept,’ but Kay heard ‘Jesus swept,’ and a marketing plan was born. Before long, she’d created dozens of magnificent brooms with polished dogwood handles and fancy hang tags, each inspired design named in honor of one of the twelve apostles.

Gary appreciated his mama’s happy play on words, but his daddy saw only sacrilege. One night Joe Earl ripped the tag from the broom called Simon and threw it at his wife, cheap bourbon sharpening the edge of his angry glare. But Kay wasn’t backing down this time. She smiled sweet, tucked the tag in her apron pocket, and headed for the door.

Which was exactly the wrong thing to do.

Joe Earl accused her of being a shitty wife, and she answered with a bank statement showing a two thousand dollar balance. In honor of her financial success, he stomped the fingers of her right hand to mush with his steel-toed Timberjack boots. Mary Kay Gray would never make another broom.

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We are not amused.

AS SOON as this is available, The very moment

I want to buy a copy...I love your writing A...just love it!

PS SD, wish you would write a book, your writing style is wonderful!

No matter that patriotism is too often the refuge of scoundrels. Dissent, rebellion, and all-around hell-raising remain the true duty of patriots.

Thank you so much!

I've been working on this sucker for four years now and the end is in sight. Once I get the manuscript wrapped up, I'll enter the agent/publisher hunt.

It's really wonderful to get positive feedback!

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We are not amused.

Bits and pieces

Hurry up, A. I want to read the entire thing. You just won't finish it....so all we get are bits and pieces. I'll buy the first book that isn't going to family.

Momo - I have been working on a novel for about two years on and off. I guess I'm on the "A" plan, so don't look for it for another couple of years. :)

Robin Hayes lied. Nobody died, but thousands of folks lost their jobs.



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Vote Democratic, the ass you save may be your own.

Oh. My. God

did you make these up A or are they really real? Now God is for sale?

No matter that patriotism is too often the refuge of scoundrels. Dissent, rebellion, and all-around hell-raising remain the true duty of patriots.

Honey pie,

there are more talking Jesus dolls out there than you can shake a burning bush at.

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We are not amused.

I have a confession to make

I placed an order for a Jesus doll a couple of days ago, after the initial story hit the newswires.

The sole purpose - an attempt to circuit-bend it.

For an example of what has already been done with talking George W. Bush dolls, click here. Hopefully, my results will be similar, and you all will be among the first to know. (But probably not until after the fall semester ends...)

"we're banging pots and pans / to make you understand / we're gonna bury you, man"

Can you make Jesus Weep?

Oh wait, that's already been done.

No matter that patriotism is too often the refuge of scoundrels. Dissent, rebellion, and all-around hell-raising remain the true duty of patriots.

This is so disturbing

Just so very disturbing.

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." - Ghandi

meesus

harry and joseph. They've married the Prince of Peace to the FreeMarket Church of the Cheap-plastic-sheeet.

"They took all the trees and put them in a tree museum Then they charged the people a dollar 'n a half just to see 'em. Don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you've got till it's gone? They paved paradise and put up a parking lot."

Oh Sweet Sheebus

Comment of the year!

Robin Hayes lied. Nobody died, but thousands of folks lost their jobs.



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Vote Democratic, the ass you save may be your own.