BREAKING: NC Constitutional Convention in the works. Monarchy on the agenda.

RALEIGH, NC - Based on a confidential report leaked by an administrative assistant at the John Locke Foundation today, North Carolina citizens will soon find themselves reclassified as subjects.

According to the document, Republican lawmakers in Raleigh will convene a constitutional convention this fall, designed to establish North Carolina as the first modern-day monarchy in the western hemisphere. When the convention adjourns, a coronation ceremony for His Majesty Arthur J. Pope III will take place at the historic governor's mansion. Assisting His Majesty in managing the kingdom will be The Little Prince, a position created specifically for Mr. Pope's long-time lackey and confidant.

Syndicate content