Too hot to handle it

There are a lot of things I don’t get about the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy. One thing for sure is when soldiers claim they’d be uncomfortable serving with gay men because they don’t want guys looking at them “in that way.” To me, this just begs the question, “Do you think you’re so hot that everyone you meet is bound to look at you ‘in that way’?”

I just don’t get jumping to conclusions. I mean, do these guys think every woman they meet is attracted to them? And, if they are as hot as they imagine themselves to be, surely they have experience in rebuffing unwelcomed suitors.

In this day and age, most of us work with people of different genders, races, ethnicities and socioeconomic backgrounds. As a heterosexual woman, I don’t assume every man I encounter is looking at me lasciviously. Nor do I assume sparks would inevitably fly if we were locked in close quarters.And, let me say for the record, if I were in a war situation, in harm’s way, I wouldn’t care if the guy who had my back were green, purple or polka dotted. I’d just be glad he was there.

So let’s get back to the “comfort” issue or more precisely the “discomfort” issue. It amazes me when people think it’s okay to say other people make them “uncomfortable.”

Fortunately, we’re way past the day when people can get away with saying that people of other races or ethnicities make them feel uncomfortable. They can say it but a tsunami of well-deserved criticism will blow their way. A caveat, of course, for the bigotry spewed by Tea Party folks and anti-immigrant zealots.

Being “uncomfortable” with someone who is different from you is not socially acceptable parlance to use when speaking about anyone. It used to be but no more. And, quite frankly, the military played a noble role in changing prejudiced hearts and minds.

Today there is more racial integration in the military than in most communities. In 1948, President Truman issued an executive order integrating the military way before racial integration happened in most institutions.

Of course, there were those who opposed Truman’s order, citing everything from discomfort to religious beliefs.

But racial integration prevailed.

So, too, will equality for gays and lesbians who only ask to serve their country openly and proudly. A giant first step was reported in news today. Following a California federal judge’s overturning of DADT in court last week, military recruiters have been told to accept gay and lesbian recruits.

Integration based on equality will not doom our military. Military leaders just need to “man up.” Ordinarily, I’d never use that term but I haven’t seen any female generals struggling with DADT.

Discomfort with difference is not an excuse. It never has been and never will be. If a soldier thinks he’s just too hot to handle working side by side with other soldiers, then maybe discrimination isn’t his biggest problem.